Colter Says the Funniest Things

I keep notes on my phone of the funny things Colter says so I can type in what he says before I have time to forget them.  Here are just a few of the more memorable things he's said in the past few months:

• Me: Colter, do you want to help me make bread today?  Colter: No, I can't today.  I'm busy.  You sad about that?
• Please Mommy, will you and Levi go get me a beard?  (he calls beer beard)
• After reading 'Pokey Little Puppy' Joey asked Colter if he is pokey and he said 'no, I'm soft.'
• Me: Colter, what are you doing?  Colter: Coughing with my nose.
• While at a restaurant in Rapid City, Colter ordered a 'Bud Life' just like Papa Larry, then when I asked him if he wanted mac and cheese he said 'let me look at the menu.'
• He loves watching the commercials, even on shows I have recorded.  He calls them commerci-mals every time.
• While watching Tangled, he said 'I tooted at the bad guy!'
• 'Don't freak out about it, Papa!'
• 'I want Great Mama Alyce to make me a real gun so I can shoot deer, elk, and cantaloupe.' (instead of antelope)
• Colter: Mommy stop singing! Me: Why? Colter: I know you like to sing, but you have to calm down and watch the road.   
• 'I'm wearing my baseball unicorn.'
• Last Halloween you said 'lick or treat' at every single door.
• You call a sandwich a sandburger. 
• You call tattoos 'too-tats'
• After tooting you say 'my butt is talking to me!'
• You say: Mommy, are you sure about this?! 

Have I mentioned I'm a total BOY MOM?!  Happy Friday!